Wednesday, 4 January 2012

How would life be if shit is nonbiodegradable?

I have this queer thought in my mind that rings me to writing this unusual article. Haha. Laugh first before I move on. Well, just wide up a bit of your restricted mind and try digesting this bewildered thought. So, how would life be if shit is really nonbiodegradable? Haha, I am laughing again. Okay. Let’s get it straight to the topic.

The basic routines being done daily since the era of mankind is eat, shit and sleep. If any of your ancestors denies this fact, he is never a human. So, let’s flashback a little to the era where mankind has just existed and started settling down. They normally shit around the jungle or the slightly intelligent ones will make hole in the ground, shit and close back. Some also took the advantage of the river as shit can easily travel and vanish even before they could notice just after they poop. As generations and generations gone, some had ideas of digging very deep shit holes near to their homes for better convenience. Now, we have toilet bowls associated with highly sophisticated sewage system that just flushes off everything in the world that you poop. In Japan, the toilet bowl itself is even more advanced as it can wash your ass the best way you prefer.

So, after having a glance through of the history of shit, we still survive in this very world only because shit is still biodegradable. So, let’s just imagine if it has become nonbiodegradable just recently. Firstly, where would we pile up the amount of shit produced by 6.985 billion people of the world’s population with an average of three times daily poop? Where would it go daily? Are we going to start digging till the core of the earth to pile up such massive amount of shit? Think about it.

Secondly, we might even have a shit minister elected to the cabinet in Parliament just to take into account of the management of shit in our daily lives. Thirdly, we might have programmes to reduce the amount of shit produced daily to the maximum of only once daily. LOL. “Zero fibre campaign!!” for an instance. Other than that, there might also be laws enacted to punish anyone who shits more than once daily maybe by a fine of RM50 etc. The worst case scenario is when someone is doomed with food poisoning. I think he might as well probably kill himself for the amount of fine he has to pay for the amount of shit he has unloaded.
Thirdly, there might be limited public toilets and citizens might have to get some “Touch N Go card” thingy just for the surveillance of the government to make sure that people abide to the laws. They might as well need this card for the toilets at their homes as well.

The scientists and technologists on the other hand would be struggling to their souls to find a remedy to convert shit to being biodegradable. The one who could succeed will surely win the Noble prize award and might as well elected as Prime Minister/President of his country. Some gadgets might as well be created to reduce or prevent one from shitting. Who knows?

And as days go by with the massive amount of shit piled up throughout the world, people will die out of infection, stress due to the torturing smell of shit or might as well commit suicide. NASA too would come up with plans to transfer shit-piles to the outerspace or might as well dump them in the moon. And when everything fails, eventually the world will end.

So the moral of the story is let’s all appreciate on even tiny little bit of things in life that might as well feel useless. Shit too needs some respect. So please be considerate whenever you use the toilet. FLUSH IT YOU MOROON!!  

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  1. Why guys punye blog got so much posts about shit????

  2. Ahahaha! You have a very creative and imaginative mind, you know that?! Shit... non-biodegradable... never seen it before! :D

    And that shit minister, let's put it in a nicer way, "Faeces Minister"!

  3. Hahah! funny!! when shit happens....>.> Flush it!